End of an Era

I am afraid I won't remember this moment and I desperately want to so I have decided to write it in case I forget. Joe just left this house for the last time. He moved out today and I waited outside for him while he did one last walk through. I looked in the door and he was standing at the kitchen drinking a glass of ice water in his grey pants that I like and red and blue striped shirt. As I looked in he looked up at me with his head tilted so classically Joe because his glasses always slid down his nose. He looked at me and then set the glass down with only the ice left in it. It's something I see him do all the time but this was the last time. Him setting the glass down seemed so final. And the ice that would melt in a little while and then I would have to clean up later, like a trace of him. It's a trace of him being there. There's so much space in the house now. The carport is too big, the frying pan, the living room. The house feels depleted of all the beautiful memories we here. I can't forget them.

"I wish I could give you the memory I have of your mother that day. I wish I could leave you certain of the images in my mind, because they are so beautiful that I hate to think they will be extinguished when I am. Well, but again, this life has its own mortal loveliness. And memory is not strictly mortal in its nature, either. It is a strange thing, after all, to be able to return to a moment, when it can hardly be said to have any reality at all, even in its passing. A moment is such a slight thing, I mean, that its abiding is a most gracious reprieve." - Marilynne Robinson

News

It's sad when you can't share the joy.

Put it Down

Today I saw a woman trapped in a car after a car accident. Her face was really peaceful and her eyes were closed. I think she must have been sleeping when it happened. It was tragically beautiful. I just got done watching All Good Things and the memory of what I saw today kept tugging at my brain. I feel like I have to write it down so I don't forget about it. All Good Things made me feel kind of crazy though.

it is nice to have a break. i still think i will not photograph people.

Can't Seem To

I just can't seem to get ahead.